Re: [Spoon-business] Burning the dead wood

["Baron von Skippy" <baronvonskippy@xxxxxxxxxxx>]

Okay, something went wrong with the last time I sent this: I've been working 
on this for a while, and I think it copied itself during one of the times I 
hit "Save draft" or something like that. Anyway, replace the entire proposal 
titled __Cleaning up__ with:

{{
__Cleaning up__

This is an A La Carte proposal.

Part 1:
{{
[[
    The flashes from the cameras was blinding. It was all he could do not 
to cover his eyes. The lights were hot on his face and chest, and a wool 
suit wasn't helping any. On any other day, any other press conference, he 
would have at least thought about these, and probably would have wondered 
why they could never air condition these things properly. Today he didn't 
notice. There were much larger problems in his mind. Such as how to get out 
of the room without a crowd of stockholders mobbing him.
    "Thank you for all coming today," he started. The low buzz of 
conversation died down and a hundred faces looked up at him expectantly over 
cameras and notepads. "As you all know, over the past two nyears, von Skippy 
Overproduction, Inc. has been suffering losses in all eight fiscal quarters. 
Sales are down, and with them, stock prices. Our accounting department has 
informed the board of directors that, quite simply, we cannot afford to pay 
the salaries of our employees for this upcoming nyear, much less continue 
shipping Gnomes at a loss. As such, vSOI is today announcung that it will 
file for Title 11 bankruptcy."
    As he went on with his speech, he wondered why he was making the 
announcement instead of someone higher up. A small concern, but it seemed 
like the sort of thing the CEO should be doing...

    A young captain walked up to the Baron and handed him a clipboard. The 
Baron glanced at it briefly, scanning its contents, and handed it back, 
nodding to the captain, who hurried away to shout commands at a group of 
troopers moving crates.
    "We're still on schedule?" It wasn't really a question, more a 
statement of how things must be.
    "So it would seem, Commander. Your men certainly seem well-prepared to 
evacuate a base."
    Commander Campion let the jest slide past him. "What exactly are we 
going to do now, sir? We can't last more than a few nweeks on our current 
funds, and we're not looking at a lot more disposable income any time soon."
    "Trim sails and survive, Commander, you know that. I'm sure sooner or 
later we can find an outlet for your men's skills, although perhaps not in 
such a legitimate setting."
    "You mean as... mercenaries?"
    "Don't be so disgusted by it. There's good money in fighting other 
people's battles."
    "I'm not disgusted, more concerned. Most of our prospective employers 
have had visits from us in the past."
    The Baron patted the side of one of the massive IID transports with a 
chuckle. "You mean we've stolen or blown up, and often both, some of their 
holdings? We might actually be able to use that on our resumes, you know."
    "But if they ever figure it out..."
    "They won't. M-Tek is getting a little close to the truth, I'll admit, 
but why would they connect vSOI and a merc company? Same for WBE. Glotmorf's 
a wily old bastard, I'll admit, but that's a leap of faith no one's going to 
take. Besides," he said, jerking a thumb in the direction of four speeders 
laden with lasers and missiles, "we're more than well-enough armed to deal 
with any pitchfork-waving angry mobs."
    Campion looked as though he were going to say something else, but BvS 
cut him off. "I understand your concern, Commander. Believe me, I'm not sure 
this will work out either, but we really don't have any other choice. Now, 
I've got to get back to the office so people don't get too suspicious."
    "Of course. Have to keep up appearances, don't we?"
    "I want to be remembered as working hard to the last."
    "That being around midnight, yes?"
    "Make sure to get me out of the building before you destroy it, would 
you? I've seen the men writing messages on the bomb you'll be using. I'd 
like to make sure they don't cause any collateral damage while they live out 
a dream of blowing up the general's office."
    "I wouldn't know what you're talking about, sir."
    The Baron shook his head, smiling, as he walked towards the miniature 
IID pod he used for personal transport.

****************************************************************
Court record for case 501537 - inquiry into events at vSOI office building 
on 44/3

11:07 - Night guard in building notices a light on in Baron von Skippy's 
office, but ignores it because "I knew he must be working late, what with 
the company going bankrupt and all. He must have had a lot of paperwork or 
something."
11:53 - Cargo speeder lands on pad on roof of building. Guard on duty at 
front gate assumes speeder is delivering office supplies (apparently a 
fairly common event), but does not check with flight control operations.
12:00 - Shift change at guard posts, but not at flight control.
12:01 - Arriving guards look at cameras and see BvS in eir office, working 
at eir computer.
12:03 - Cargo speeder lifts off from roof of building.
12:06 - vSOI office builiding demolished by Whoopass-based explosion. Police 
Gremlin teams find no trace of BvS. A spokesgremlin says afterwards "Not 
that you'd expect to find a lot of bodies in that mess. We did find one 
little puddle of what looked like random strings of DNA, which is probably 
all that's left of some poor sap."
****************************************************************

Choose your own adventure!
If you want vSOI ruined and vSET in hiding with a LOT of weapons, vote YES!
If you want vSOI intact and making lots of money, you're out of luck!
If you want it that way anyway, vote NO and buy some Gnomes!
If you're totally apathetic, ABSTAIN!
If none of the above apply, CONFORM!
]]

In Rule 154 [[Dimensions]], remove the text "All Gnomes are destroyed; 
weather gnomes destroyed in this way do not cause an update of the weather" 
from subsection B.6.

Remove sections E.4.5 [[Sheep Gnomes and Ancient Monoliths]] and F.6 
[[Towels]] from Rule 301.

Also from Rule 301, remove the text "If it or its location is hit by a 
thrown Bomb Gnome, it is unaffected" in section E.6 and "If the player has 
any Gnomes in eir possession, those Gnomes all become Basic Gnomes with 
three hit points each." from section E.8.

In Rule 405 [[Weather]], replace both occurrences of "1d11" in subsection 
C.2 with "1d10," and remove subsection C.2.7, renumbering the remaining 
subsections accordingly.

Repeal Rule 441 [[Gnomes]].

In Rule 625 [[Ministries]], remove subsection C.7, renumbering remaining 
subsections accordingly.

In Rule 698 [[Insta-Rules]], remove the text " | gnomes" in the second 
paragraph.

In Rule 705 [[Bonus Boxes]], remove the text "any Gnomes in eir possession 
are destroyed, " from subsection B.4, "Gnomes and " from subsection B.5, and 
subsections B.8 and B.9.

Repeal Rule 748 [[Overseas Gnomes]].

Repeal Rule 850 [[Gnomes on Sale]].

Amend the text "Any player may pay 30 points to vSOI to buy an Airspeeder, 
or 20 points if the player is a member of vSOI." in Rule 1071 
[[Airspeeders]] to read "Any player may pay 500 BNS to the Admin to buy an 
Airspeeder."

Also in Rule 1071, remove the text "When a bomb gnome explodes on a square 
occupied by a Speeder, that Speeder loses 14 points of integrity."

Deactivate Rule 1183 [[The Infinite Improbablilty Drive]]. [[I want to keep 
the thing, but the method for getting IIDs will have to be fixed. Any 
thoughts, anyone?]]

Rename 1341.B.6.1 "Defense Platforms" and replace the first paragraph of 
that subsection with:
The platforms in this subsection may target an enemy of a type defined under 
(TARGET) which is between (MIN) and (MAX) spaces away, (RATE) times per 
nweek, no more than once per target per nweek, dealing damage as though it 
were an army with (ATK) Attack Power and 1 Strength. Each costs the 
purchasing entity (BNS) BNS and (RU) RUs. If the purchasing entity does not 
have enough BNS or RUs, the sale is cancelled

In Rule 1342 [[The Groundhog]], replace "Gnomes" with "Sulfur."

In Rule 1469 [[Proto-Ice Bombs]], remove "or Gnomes" from the last sentence 
of the comment text in the third item of section B, and remove the sixth and 
eigth bulleted items of that section.

Remove the fourth paragraph of Rule 1503 [[Mass]], and the following items 
on the list of masses:
Towel: 3 (Dry)
Towel: 10 (Wet)
Gnome: 10 [[Those in bags count as 0, see above]]

Remove all members of vSOI from vSOI and destroy its charter.
}}

Part 2:
{{
Destroy the society named "von Skippy Experimental Technologies."

Create a Society with the name "vSET" and the following charter:
{{
A. The Leader and Anonymity
One member of vSET is known as the Leader of vSET. The player who has been a 
member of vSET the longest is the Leader of vSET. The Leader of vSET is 
responsible for maintaining a list of all members of vSET. Only the 
Administrator and members of vSET have access to the list of members of 
vSET, although the identity of the Leader of vSET is public knowledge.

B. Joining vSET
Players may apply to join vSET by sending a private message to the Leader, 
who will consult the other members of vSET for a private vote. If at least 
2/3 of the members of vSET agree to accept the applicant's request, the 
applicant becomes a member of vSET.

C. vSET Solidarity
Members of vSET may not perform serious hostile actions towards one another. 
The term "serious hostile actions" will be defined by convention and 
precedent. If a member knowingly performs a seriously hostile action towards 
another member, it will be up to the uninvolved members of vSET to determine 
consequences, which are binding. Consequences should avoid any actions which 
would make a player's membership in vSET obvious, including the posting of 
out-of-character messages and ousting offending members.

The previous paragraph may be ignored by an agreement among vSET members 
previous to the hostile actions being taken.

In addition, vSET members should, whenever possible, conspire to cooperate 
for the good of vSET and themselves.

D. Leaving vSET
vSET members can quit at any time, providing they first promise to the 
members of vSET to not inform any other players of the membership of vSET or 
that they have left it. Players who break this promise may expect 
retaliation and general nastiness from vSET. vSET may oust a member if at 
least 3/4 of vSET members agree to oust that member, although this is 
strongly advised against.
}}
If e is not already, make the player who made this proposal a member of 
vSET.
}}
}}

Bloody stupid whatever-screwed-up, if you ask me.

[[BvS]]

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