Eric Gerlach on 26 Apr 2002 04:32:16 -0000

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spoon-business: Proposal

This would have come out sooner if it were not for that darned sushi...

__We can't speak properl... uh... right__

So I'm enjoying a pause of relaxation on the Grid, eagerly anticipating the termination of the nweek when all the interesting football excitement will happen, when suddenly I heard a faint exclamation:


My instruments of aural perception awakened.

"Help!", the exclamation stimulated my aural receptors again, only this time with greater amplitude.

"Who is it?", I vocalised.

"It's us!  'Morf and Wonko!", the reciprocation came.

"Hello, gentlemen.  How may I be of service today?"

"We can't speak with words of more than two sylla.... uh.... word parts!"

"Should I understand that your vocalisations can only consist of words with two syllables? That's horrendous!" I imparted, snickering internally as to their predicament, of which I was fully preinformed.

"Yes!  It's all because of that entro... uh... chaos thing!"

"Entropy? Ah, yes, bitch, ain't it?", I retorted, remembering the message Glotmorf had delivered to the forum previously in the nweek, "But, I might interrogate of you to what solution you might wish me to implement? I have no motivation to interfere in the operations of this regulation."

"Yes you do."

"And on what reasoning do you found that assumption?"

"Look at the roster", they said, indicating the entropy column thereupon. I let myself calculate upon the numerals that presented themselves into my perception. I was flabbergasted.

"Oh fudgesickles. Here I am presuming that I have the opportunity to choose the antagonist out of the plethora of characters I have at my disposal, and it becomes apparant to me that if I remain inactive, I will experience the full arsenal of this entrapment of entropy!", I pronounced, being particularily proud of the alliteration.

The partnership in front of me seemed unimpressed, "Can you fix it?", they inquired.

"It is within the realm of possibility that I might fix it, yes." I uncovered my rule book, and began to investigate the irritation of entropy. After considerable deliberation, I returned to the coordinates where I had departed from the duo earlier.

"I have dicovered the fundamental difficulty with the regulations on syllable prononciation with respect to entropy. The difficulty is at this location," I announced, indicating the formulas that calculated the restrictions on syllable employment. "The original intention of entropy limitations was to embolden the necessity of players who are excessively enthusiastic to make a reduction in their activity, as well as to encourage those who have not participated to do so in an increased fashion. Is it thus plausable that the restrictions are too constraining, as in eventuality all of the population of this entertaining undertaking will discover themselves so restricted! So, noting its intentions at creation, I conjecture that a resolution would read something like the following:"

Revise Rule 440 as follows:

Replace the last paragraph with:
"If a player's Entropy exceeds (((Maximum Entropy) / (# of players)) * (3 / 4)) , all eir messages posted to the public forum must consist of words of two or fewer syllables. If a player's Entropy exceeds ((Maximum Entropy) / (# of players)), all eir messages posted to the public forum must consist of words of one syllable. Comprehensible abbreviations and acronyms are acceptable in order to comply with this."

"I should consider that this proposition should alleviate your obstacle to unrestricted oratory?"

Their visual organs reoriented themselves and fixated at a solitary point on my forehead. I began to feel the burrowing intensity of their gaze....

Ah who cares is a similar proposal is out there already, and maybe this won't pass. Bloody hell I had fun writing it!